Dear World

Please Kill Me,

So, I’ve been doing this here writing thing for a little bit of time now. Not so long that I can claim to have any hidden knowledge (though I do on drunken occasions) nor so little that I would feign having acquired aforementioned knowledge (as one would on drunken occasions).

Nope, my career is nestled comfortably on a cot–somewhere between Stephen King and {Insert Self-Help Book Author Here}. That being said, (though, I know nothing), I have made a few observations.

Over the course of any creative career (sex-slave or otherwise) you tend to run into, come across, or otherwise galivant blindly past your peers. Some will excel, some will fail (don’t get nervous, it’s just the truth), and other’s still, will hop back and forth between the line of pure commitment and good ol’ fashioned tom-f*ckery (which in all honesty is a worse fate than failing).

What you will realize–at any point in your journey–is that everyone is somewhat moving. Whether that movement is at a snail’s pace or as fast as a slut at a prom–I couldn’t say (though I would like to meet her #Kidding #AmI?). 

The point is that, once people stop moving, they’re no longer in the game. There is no comeback. There is no revival. There is no greedy corporate reboot. They’re done–only to start again at the beginning (should they be so bold).

For those who’ve stayed, (despite the dark abyss of longing and doubtful gazes into the moonlight), there is really no hope. There’s no light at the end of the tunnel here–they just persist, and never really know if it’ll all have been worth it in the end (don’t worry, the hopeful part’s coming).

Despite how crazy it may seem, the fact of the matter is, that they have stayed because they’ve come to one solid realization. It takes time.

What we do is subjective by nature. There is never really any “being the best”, or  “the brightest”, or “the second coming of Odysseus” (Oedipus?). There is only ever the next project and we’re only ever as good as the last thing that we’ve done. Again, art is subjective by nature.

What I have seen (in my nude travels across the literary tundra #FrozenParts), is that the ones who tend to make it, hang in there until their last friggin’ breath. If you do this–what we do–and you’re doing it purely for the art, then that should be enough. Any progress/success other than the act of …acting–is just icing on the metaphorical cake.

That being said, (did I use that phrase already?) remember that ART IS SUBJECTIVE, if you hang in there long enough, eventually your spoke on the wheel will spring up for you to grab hold of (be warned, it’s not a suppository).

So, while you’re wrapping your gifts, munching on noodles, and likely having the coffee beans pumped from your stomach–remember that what we do is a marathon with no first place…nor last place. The individuals that win on this particular track are the people who KEEP RUNNING IT.

If you’re doing this thing–pure of heart and fueled with spirit–I implore you to hang in there. Eventually, your finish line will come. On that day, should you be ready, you won’t want a trophy, a ribbon, or any frivolous menial thing. You’ll just want to keep running–because you love the damn race so much.

Don’t worry about the finish line. Don’t worry about where you’re at right now. Don’t even think about the consequences of blowing an authorial knee or pulling a financial muscle. Just run. Run like your life depends on it. (Doesn’t it?)

If you lack motivation. If you lack something to push you. If you want the finish line–but still don’t quite have it in your line of sight and are thinking about just packing it in, DON’T.

I beg you to keep pushing. Keep fighting the good fight. Keep creating.

All you need to do is run the race.

Everything else will come with time. Anything good takes time.

If you could ask for anything, ask for more of it, then work like you have none.

 

Crush Your Tuesday,

–Antwan Crump.

 

Follow me on Twitter, won’t you?: @I_AM_ANTWAN

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Welcome to the world of the macabre. In this long-awaited anthology, we delve into the dark nuances of the human spirit. From the apocalypse to murder and brutal realities we remorselessly explore them all, in search of the truths that evil holds. Can you face the darkest corners of your psyche or will you cower back to your fairytales and superhero mythologies? When you tire of the lies—we’ll be waiting for you here…in the dark.

Follow me on Twitter, won’t you?: @I_AM_ANTWAN

Follow @I_AM_ANTWAN