Dear World

Please Kill Me,

Greetings, and Happy Thursday my primetime postscript pariahs, (I know – sometimes I even surprise myself  with some of these names.) Well, we’re almost at the end of the week, and it seems like most of us will come out generally unscathed *crosses fingers*. Because it’s Thursday and my next full textual rant won’t be until after the Podcast and the Recap – I want to give you guys my quick thoughts on something.

Tagging – ( otherwise known as a graffiti artist’s wet dream). So I’ve had a little bump in followers lately – a success that I attribute of course to consistency, regularity, and general buffoonery. Now, I’m not a total idiot- so it’s easy for me to also understand that a large part of my draw is -well- me. Once I learned how to properly tag my articles – I was able to attract some much appreciative (and appreciated) followers. Rather than fellate you with gratitude let’s go over what tagging is. (For those who know skip the next paragraph).

Tagging is essentially an SEO, that not only helps people to find you in their basic internet searches but also allows individual users to find the specific types of articles and/or information that they are looking for – this can be you if you do it properly. A couple things you should know, though.

“Oh hey, you guys can come back!”

Okay, everyone here? Good –

1.) Keep the tags relevant. When you tag your piece or project with every word under the Shakespearean sun, not only will you attract a ton of people who will demand your execution, (especially at the site of an automotive article with the hashtag #Kittens), but you’ll also be doing yourself a disservice. By doing this you think that you’re extending your reach – but what you’re actually doing is diluting your articles visibility, (as search engines tend to favor more direct- and frankly less douchey- methods of branding).

2.) Simplicity is key. Make sure to keep your tags short, sweet, and to the point. You can never fail with one relevant word. Like #Balls, #In, #Your, or #Face – all lovely options. The point to remember is that tags are just a glorified form of categorization (#patent pending)- as such, you should avoid full sentences or long phrases. When people search for your article – they’ll be typing the exact, or similar words to your tag. Again, keep it short.

And lastly, (because I’ve got things to do today),

3.) Tag or Die. Tags are an important part of getting as much exposure to your work as possible. Though you may be able to find some success through other means – having this as a supplement will surely handle a ton of footwork for you. It’s fast, it’s easy, and damn it! It’s just something you got to do. Take it from a former #anTAGonist (sorry, I couldn’t help myself), in the long run, it will only do you good.

Thanks for checking in everybody. I hope this helped, at the very worst – at least you laughed (or learned something. I don’t know, go away. Okay, come back).

Writer’s Block Podcast tomorrow and as always (except for last week), the Recap on Saturday – hope you guys tune in and love it more than fat kids love cake. (#50Cent).

Tagging your mind,

-Antwan Crump.